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Pick at the pops: 09 June 2008

Girls Aloud

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Our weekly round-up of the weird and wonderful world of pop music...

What’s that old adage? You don’t know what you’ve got ‘til it’s gone? Well, perhaps Mercury Records (and its huge, overbearing parent, Universal Music) should take heed and greater care of ickle Janet Jackson. The 42-year-old perennial little sister says her record company (that’s Mercury and its huge etc.) have stopped promoting recent album Discipline, after only six months and one measly non-hit single, ‘Feedback’. As Janet says, “I don’t think you’re going to hear another single off this album.” We only managed to get two-and-a-half tracks into the album over here before dozing off, so it’s probably a blessing.

Maybe Mercury know exactly what they’re throwing away, after all. But can the rest of us be so assured? Take man of the people Sting and his cuddly Police cohorts – you see, there we go again, being all snide. Won’t we regret our cynicism when they play their last ever gig (again) at Madison Square Gardens on 7 August and we never see them on a multi-million dollar payday tour again? No.

Seemingly impervious to any regret, the BBC are reportedly not only unashamed of the recent series of Lily Allen and Friends, but they're also busting a gut to compound the error. Yes, they’ve apparently signed up Girls Aloud to host a similar show - with a Ł500,000 sweetener, for crying out loud. Is this what our licence fee is for? A chance to see Kimberley, Cheryl et al, week in week out, draped over a sofa in alluring outfi… ah, I see. Carry on.

You can’t regret what you never had, and we may never even hear the hallowed Kylie and Coldplay collaboration. But what’s this? Chris Martin has explained the absence of the track ‘Luna’ on the new album: “Well, it’s just too sexy. At this point we cannot be that sexy”. However, he does offer a ray of hope: “It will be on a record we will put out at the end of next year.” Right, does that mean the Coldplay boys will be ready to be “sexy” in 18 months’ time? What on earth is going to happen between now and then? Actually, don’t tell me – I’ve just eaten.

Matthew Horton

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